last one for 2009

I have always try to avoid writing cheesy and cliché subjects but this time I am just going to write one of those cheesy and cliché end-of-year-look-back entries so do bear with me. 2009 has been nerve-wreaking, challenging and exciting - in simple words.

In reality, there are so much ups and downs that it's difficult to honestly and accurately describe my year. The relocation to Geneva has a huge impact on our lives and sometimes I think if I look back at this year I might actually forget the fact that this is also the year that my son turned one, took his first steps, head-butted me with love for the first time, said his first words mama (tearing me up), crawled, smiled consciously etc - well, you get what I mean.

In 2009 I learnt relearnt about laughter, compassion, tolerant, patient, love, anger, anxiety and trust. In 2009, I think I have laughed on a daily basis in my daily life. I was grateful at the end of each day and I looked forward to the start of the next day. I am grateful for my husband, my son, my health, my families, my friends and the opportunities that were placed on my path. I hope that with the coming year, I will be a better person. A person who can truly love and give - yet stay true and not boring .....hahaha - in another word I hope that 2010 will be a year that I start to love and give with no reservation and no expectation. I also strive in 2010  to become a person who is neither optimistic nor pessimitic but a realist. To go with the flow and not give up when the ride gets rough.  I look forward to the new year to a new life and I am ready to march into the parades of life.

“ The sage has no interest of his own, but takes the interests of the people as his own. He is kind to the kind; he is also kind to the unkind: for Virtue is kind. He is faithful to the faithful; he is also faithful to the unfaithful: for Virtue is faithful. ”



— Chapter 49, Tao Teh Ching

Dearest friends and families, I wish you all the happiness, goodness and love for 2010. May all your resolutions, wishes, plans and ambitions come true.

Limbo

Yeah - that's the state that we are in right now. Vincent's probation period has been extended by another 3 months. We've just heard of it last week and it has stirred up a little storm.

I think, on one hand, it's not really such a big deal. If and only if everything works out in the end!! For Vincent, I can only imagine how de-motivating and discouraging it is. All the work and the effort and the hours and the energy that he has been putting in. On the home front and for me personally, it is a little inconvenient now, because I feel like we kind of have to be on the go at any moment. It does not make a lot of sense to make any concrete commitment like going to french classes or join any children's club - considering how expensive everything is and the financial burden that it will become suppose it does not work out! Talking about financial burden. No, I don't even want to go there, sistas and brothas!

It's a little bit of a shame considering it is almost christmas, a time to be resting, recharging and rejoicing with the family. (well, at least for me it is) But I refused to be too affected by it. There are also many reasons to be celebrating and be thankful for.

1. Max will turn one in 9 days (can you believe it???)
2. I am in a very previlige position of running a household and watching Max grow in such close proximity
3. We are still happily married (phew!)

and perhaps another 100 other reasons if I put my heart into it....

You know, in a way I am really happy about our decision to stick together and come to Geneva as a family. True that there is less stability financially but the support that we can provide and have given to each other is really priceless. In chinese it is called 患难见真情!

PS: Sorry for the lack of post....
PPS: If we don't talk before Christmas, have a good one anyway!!
PPPS: If we don't meet up in Holland, while we are there, we really do regret it!

With a lot of love and good wishes,
Carolyn